The school where my son goes to, held its school year’s moving up program or closing ceremony at the Philam Life Auditorium. And for the two days that I went there, one day allotted for rehearsals and the other for the actual program, I came to a generalization that,
All parents are born…
1. ENTERTAINERS
During the program, everybody performed well, including those in the audience, the parents most specifically.
First, there was this tough looking dad, who at the beginning of the program, I mistakenly ” profiled and i.d.-ed ” in my mind, as either a soldier or a government official . Yet, he perfectly executed all the hand movements of the music, “Walk Like An Egyptian “.
His hand gestures were even in synched with those of his little girl who was dancing on the stage. If he had ample leg room that time, which unfortunately ( or fortunately?), he most certainly did not have, he could have performed the hand and leg movement all together.
Second, there was this mom at the sidelines , whose back was at us . She was dancing emphatically and raising her arms vigorously as her child was dancing on stage . She had so much energy, one may expect dance choreographers, Geelen Eugenio or Anna Feliciano in person , should she turn around. But well , as they say, ” the secret to humor is surprise. ” After that dance number ended , a part of the mom’s body, took me by surprise as she turned around, – her protruding belly . All the while, it was a pregnant mommy out there, trying to put ” Dancing With The Stars ” off the air. I was still gaping, as she casually went back to her seat, as if all she had in front of her was a beach ball.
Third, not far from where we were seated, I saw this giant of a dad , probably standing at six feet, crouching and sitting so low, trying his very best, not to be seen by his son. Apparently, as I overheard one parent say, the son would most likely break into crying fits, should he see the Dad. I commend the dad, for having successfully hid himself well.
– a world-class act, one of “fuerza bruta ” calibre, for how else was he able to hide all six feet of him. ( think pau Gasol, hiding behind a frying pan.)
Last, at the far end of our row, were the comic-in-tandem parents. The dad and the mom were making all the funny faces our galaxy could every think of. Chaplin who? But of course , all these, just to cheer up their little guy , who was on stage and was on the verge of crying. It most certainly looked like, it took all the Dad’s strength to keep himself from going up the stage and finish the dance together with his kid.
Yeah, I could not help but stifle a giggle for I found great humor around me. The flurry of activities down where I sat, was far more interesting than those up on the stage. Parents, really. But that was of course before I caught myself singing, ( in my mega watts voice, dolby system: surround) ” Get back scruffy, Get back scruffy, get back you flea infested mongrel.” ( A line from Baha Man’s song” Who Let The Dogs Out” of which my son was dancing to, on stage.)
This also goes without mentioning my husband’s shoulders which were building up into a rhythmic shoulder movement while he was taking my son’s picture.
That was our crowd, alright. ” Talentadong Pinoy :The Parents Edition. ” Parents are inherently talented. Singers , Dancers, Clowns, Gymnasts, Acrobats…
2. PATINTERO PLAYERS
” Patintero is a children’s game usually played on empty streets, school yards and beaches. It involves a grid drawn on the ground where one team will try to pass through while the opposing team tries to catch them without leaving the grid’s lines at all times.”
-Source : Wikipedia
After being in the auditorium for a good three hours, I therefore conclude that, Patintero is a traditional Filipino children’s game…BEST PLAYED BY PARENTS.
Picture out this little child for instance who was performing on stage. For a moment there he was just somehow calmly performing his steps on the stage, when he suddenly decided to bolt from his place and run like mad towards the..(?)
Taaaaaadaaaaaah..
… end of the stage.!
Imagine the surprise of the teacher-prompters who were situated right below the stage or the look of the astonished audience, like me for instance.
I felt just like that time while I was watching one of those acrobatic shows in Beijing , where I had to hold my breath , for fear that inhaling oxygen might affect the performer’s state of equilibrium and cause him to fall of the trapeze.
But of course the child’s mom, no doubt an expert patintero player in her day, in an instant, was already there with her arms instinctively spread widely to her sides.
Gotcha!
Sorry kid, but mom made it all the way to Palarong Pambansa.
3. PSYCHICS
Although Manang Bola of the Filipino children’s show, Batibot consults her crystal ball:
” Ba be bi bo bu,Perlas na bilog wag patulogtulog sabihin agad sa akin ang sagot Ba be bi bo bu..”
Parents DO NOT.
(or as exhibited by the parents of my son’s schoolmates that is.)
Parents are way clairvoyant than dear Manang Bola, especially if the future bumps, scratches ,grazes and bruises of their children are concern. No crystal balls. During rehearsals, I saw this mom telling her stubborn little boy to get off the seat.
Something like…
Mom: ” Get off the seat, You might…….F A L L.! “
And well , even before Mom finished saying the whole sentence and the verb , ” FALL “, ” Fall ” was already taking its present progressive form..
Yep, he was already falling down fast alright, but not too fast for clairvoyant mom to catch him on time.
Or take this mom for example who said to his son,
Mom: Do not eat your ” baon” yet, that would be for later…
All these she uttered, while she was busy fixing the pigtail of her little girl and her back was turned from her son.
Imagine the little boy’s face as he was about to reach his lunch box thinking mom could not see him. It was as though , mom literally had eyes on her back.
Parents are indeed amazing psychics:
a. They catch their children even before they fall.
b. They know what their kids want, even before they speak.
c. And lastly, they somehow know their children well, that they would always have a hunch what the kids are doing behind their backs..
4. WITH OCTOPUS ARMS
I was outside the auditorium when I saw DOC OCT and OCTO MOM: A Dad had his video cam, his messenger bag, a lunch bag, a tumbler and a backpack on his left hand while his little girl’s costume on the other. A mom was hugging her bag while she was holding her umbrella, a burger, a pack of french fries, a cup of orange juice ..the works! Another mom had a shoulder bag, a tote bag, a plastic bag, a back pack, -there goes the bag lady.
Of course there was also this Dad bringing his child’s costume, his camera, his phone and his messenger bag while holding his son on the other, err , OUR SON , actually.
( ” Sweetie, apart from your day job, do you have a night job I know nothing about?”.. like maybe in the lines of ” The circus has come to town?” )
We parents, well, we will always be literally and figuratively, all arms for our children.
5. WITH CHEETAH LEGS
I saw a large number of physically fit runners during that closing ceremony , an event which totally, had no relation to running at all. There was this couple who had to run after their child who did not want to go to the backstage and be with the teachers. Or this mom , who came in huffing and puffing, while dragging her son on the side. ( like having just caught one of the three little pigs.) Big bad wolf, you are so passé. Yes, there was also myself, who was being given a hard time by my four-year old, who thought that running after him was my favorite pastime.
Remember that dialogue between a parent and her daughter in a sexy film , where the mom said the lines, ” Ang mundo ay isang malaking Quiapo..”
I must say she took that from a parent’s point of view and not necessarily from a wife’s viewpoint. You see, when you become a parent , you would be doing all the running you could ever imagine, especially during those first four years of your child.
Kailangan, ” Takbong Snatcher “ . ( You run like a thief)
Toddler and preschoolers can give parents a fright when they run like there is no tomorrow. These kids surely are making good use of those 300 bones they were born with, while we adults have those 206 to reckon with.
6. WITH GIRAFFE NECKS
In the world, the Giraffes have the longest necks, among land animals. But did you know that they also have seven vertebrae in the necks just like the same number of neck bones that humans have?
So it should not be a surprise to see in the auditorium , a great number of giraffes twisting their necks around, my husband included.
Oh well, I perfectly understood the other parents, who came in later and occupied the back seats of the auditorium, for they really had to crane their necks, just to see their children’s performances.
my husband and I got a better view of our kid by being be able take one of those second row seats. But why were we still craning our necks? Enough for me to ask my husband, ” How’s the weather up there .”
We can never get enough of our children. And if we could, we would want to see how their finger nails or hair strands would look like from our vantage point.
7. WITH SUBATOMIC PARTICLE -LIKE BEHAVIOR
Somehow in quantum mechanics, behaviors of subatomic particles allow them to be in two places at a given time. Parents are so SUBATOMIC PARTICLE LIKE.
During rehearsal day, as I was passing through the entrance door of the auditorium, I saw on my left, one dad, busy tinkering with his camera while another parent , with her video cam.
I was already halfway the place, walking towards my seat, when I saw up front, on the stage, a child about to grab the flag near the podium. But even before the kid could , the dad was quick enough to be there to catch the flag.
An act that merited a ” haaaaaaaaay salamat ” ( thank you ) from the audience.
( and the rehearsals have not even started yet. )
But I was astonished more than ever when I realized that he was the same dad I passed by milli- seconds ago, along the entrance. How was that physically possible for someone to leap across the venue just like that?
” Wingardium Laviosa.” I must have missed that then. Well, we all are, after all, made up of atoms.
8. PAPPARAZZIS
Admittedly, during my son’s school’s closing ceremony, I felt like I was a performer, other than one of the audience. I excited more than my son, he seemed relaxed and calm. It was the first big audience performance for my son as a student and our first as parents.
( by the way, is stage mom spelled as one word or two words? )
And when we were approaching the backstage, where I was supposed to leave him, my son kept on telling me ” Mom, teacher said, the mommies and daddies should bring us up to here only, and they can leave. ” Oh but I, of course, did not leave him at the door, in spite of him telling me again and again to do so. I RUDELY brushed him aside and chatted with his teachers. In other words, I totally went inside with him. And insisted on taking his picture there inside the back stage room. ” Annoying paparazzi alert. “
I did hear my son tell me over and over that he does not want his picture taken and he was forever asking me to leave. But I brushed him aside and went on taking his picture, till he rudely shoved my phone and it fell on the floor. I told him I was quite unhappy with what he did and…I left the room. It was only till after the whole program was over that I realized, I was rude to him too, by not leaving when he asked me too. ” One MEAN turn, deserved another. “
9. TALENT MANAGERS
You know how it is , when PR managers of celebrities make a real big deal on the billing of their ” alaga ” ( ward) ? Or on how they complain about the names of their celebrity wards appearing too small or too far or too last on the movie posters? Or how television camera men seemed to have not favored their wards by taking the wrong angle of their celebrity wards? My husband seemed to have manifested the PR Manager syndrome. While my son was performing , first, he asked why my son’s shirt was tucked out.
( duh?) ( the dance theme was hip hop, daddy!)
Next he asked why my son’s cap was placed sideways on his head. ( I was sitting beside a comedian that time, I guess.)
Last, he kept on pointing out, that he did not like the idea of our son, being placed at the back, during the performance. But it surely was quite obvious that the kids were arranged according to their heights. Since it appeared that our son was taller than his peers , it was just right that he was placed at the back. And even then, the kids were also positioned alternately, so no one really covered anyone.
From where we were seated , we could even see the tip of my son’s shoe laces, really. BUT my husband just kept clicking his tongue, like so.
10. RELIGIOUS
As my son’s prayer go, ” Our hands we fold, our heads we bow….”
Need more to say?
At the auditorium, as I looked around me, I saw parents who like me, had their hands clasp…
in prayer.
There is just something about our children on stage that gives us not only happiness but also apprehensions.
Will he experience stage fright?
Will he need me on stage?
Will he need a hug?
Will my child cry?
And you cannot help but say a prayer to calm yourself down and conquer your fears.
But of course we parents, despite being stage parents at that, we still under-estimate our children, sometimes.
In reality, guess who really had stage fright?
Or who needed who?
Or wanted to be hugged tightly?
Or who cried?
One parent actually spoke to me during rehearsals and she told me that as long as her child would perform , she would do anything,
So imagine the shock of that parent when her little boy danced like a pro during the actual ceremonies.
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” Thank you Lord for the daily miracles you give us parents.
Thank you for our children.
May we be as courageous as them when they are on stage , amen. “
